The Truth will Set you Free!
Frankie:
My fiancée and I broke up because of his emotional involvement with his ex-girlfriend, her sister who is a single mother, and the sister's 17 yr old daughter. I have 2 boys from my previous marriage & I never felt he gave us what he gives his ex's family of himself. We are still in love with each other, but he says he will never give up his 'friends' for anyone and insists that I am the one who has to be OK with this. We've tried counselling, unsuccessfully. What do you think of his (or my) behaviour?
Karolyn
Karolyn:
You need to be clear why you are uncomfortable about your boyfriend’s involvement with his ex and her family. He says they are friends. Do you not believe or trust him? Are you afraid he will cheat and you will lose him?
Fear and insecurities are paralyzing because they restrain us from speaking our truth. Truth is liberating. What is your truth – and what is his?
Have a calm, honest and open discussion with him about why you feel threatened by this friendship. Ask him to be completely candid also – does he still have romantic feelings for his ex? Is he conflicted?
Once you both have a deeper understanding of the real issue, and if you wish to remain together, you will need to craft a compromise that satisfies both of you.
Good luck.
My fiancée and I broke up because of his emotional involvement with his ex-girlfriend, her sister who is a single mother, and the sister's 17 yr old daughter. I have 2 boys from my previous marriage & I never felt he gave us what he gives his ex's family of himself. We are still in love with each other, but he says he will never give up his 'friends' for anyone and insists that I am the one who has to be OK with this. We've tried counselling, unsuccessfully. What do you think of his (or my) behaviour?
Karolyn
Karolyn:
You need to be clear why you are uncomfortable about your boyfriend’s involvement with his ex and her family. He says they are friends. Do you not believe or trust him? Are you afraid he will cheat and you will lose him?
Fear and insecurities are paralyzing because they restrain us from speaking our truth. Truth is liberating. What is your truth – and what is his?
Have a calm, honest and open discussion with him about why you feel threatened by this friendship. Ask him to be completely candid also – does he still have romantic feelings for his ex? Is he conflicted?
Once you both have a deeper understanding of the real issue, and if you wish to remain together, you will need to craft a compromise that satisfies both of you.
Good luck.
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